Slaatvania (Pronounced slaht-vahn-nee-uh) is a country which FistShark often deals with. Located likely somewhere in Eastern Europe, the country is ran by the Lebedev Administration, under the rule of General Lebedev, and is an archetype of former Eastern Bloc nations, Pottsylania-like countries, and dictatorships in general.
Early History Edit
Little is known about Slaatvanian history, as it's rarely discussed in the executive meetings. According to Jim, Slaatvania is always in some sort of war, "a cold one or otherwise", indicating that Slaatvania has had a long history of instability or feuding with other nations. Assuming it's located in Eastern Europe, it's likely that it had a similar history to other former Eastern Bloc nations, having had a communist dictatorship established and falling into a period of instability, economic hardship, and corruption in government afterwards. Around the mid-90s was when the Lebedev Administration came to be, under the leadership of General Lebedev, with the help of FistShark, who apparently assassinated a few leaders to bring him in. After this, a mutual relationship was established between each, where the Lebedev Administration would send over whatever content or products they think FistShark could use, as well as becoming a cheap source of labor for FistShark, and FistShark, in turn, would help promote the Lebedev Adminstration among its citizens, draw international attention away from the actions of the administration, and get rid of whatever questionable content might lead to rebellion or international conviction.
Slaatvanian Civil War Edit
From the early-to-mid 2010s, the Lebedev Adminstration made actions which resulted in public outrage. First, the Administration created the tax tax, which was a tax on taxes. Though the uprising was quelled, the incident would come up in the public consciousness when General Lebedev declared himself pharaoh and had the people make a pyramid for him. Not only was the pyramid a failure (Apparently, due to the lack of sand in the area, the people had to work with only dirt and rubble, resulting in what was essentially a quarry), but the entire act of Lebedev declaring himself pharaoh was generally hated by the people, thinking that it was simply arrogant. In response to this, several armed rebellions rose up against General Lebedev in late 2015, causing general economic problems and international attention. No single major rebellion rose as several of them thought they had better governing ideas, better t-shirts, etc., and because of the amount of rebellions, General Lebedev decided to have them quarrel among themselves until one would come out on top. These rebellions include:
- The People's Republic of Slaatvania: Nothing much is known. Based on the name, it might be similar to other communist rebellions or nations like People's Republic of China, the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, etc., though that is all that can be assumed. It and the other two similarly named rebellions apparently have little distinguishing features among one another.
- The Republican Peoples of Slaatvania: Read description above.
- The Slaatvanian Peoples' Republic of Slaatvania: First verse, same as the first.
- Scorpions (The German Metal Band): The most peaceful of the insurrections, the band has been playing their hit 1991 power ballad Winds of Change at the nation's border for the duration of the conflict. It's unclear whether they're actually trying to rebel or not, though if they are, it's likely that if they win, they'll immediately fall to government forces.
- The Sons of Slaatvania: A group who took influence from contraband issues of the Uncanny X-Men, the Sons of Slaatvania have used this as their basis of knowledge for rebellion, dressing up as superheroes and attempting to mimic the powers of some of the X-Men. While the executives believe they appeal to teenagers, their lack of training in rebellion, as well as their rather poor weaponry (One, in an attempt to recreate Wolverine's claws, merely taped butter knives onto his hands), generally made unlikely candidates to win.
Since FistShark was unable to keep press attention away from the Lebedev Administration, and couldn't transport products neither in nor out of the country, the executives, in December, 2015, had to consider whether to keep supporting the general in the civil war or support one of the rebellions instead.